Let's Start Again.
A diary entry to myself.
As we begin our 10th week of lock down it's hard not to look at my physical self and the 10 weeks I've squandered in taking the opportunity to keep fit.
But hey, I'm not here to tell you to look back. Instead it's look forward.
Look forward to this being over, possibly not ever back to normal. To the time when you'll once again have the chance to run in those remote places where you find so much solace. Those places where you can quiet the even noisy thoughts in your head. They're not bad thoughts. There's just to many of them (ideas, plans and solutions to problems).
As my mojo again fades like the ink on the 'Thank you NHS' signs sellotaped to people's windows I'm not letting it phase me. Hell, that's the least of my and the worldly worries. Instead I'm jus going to run or cycle when I can. Hopefully enough to keep a semblance of 'base fitness' so that every run or cycle doesn't make passers by start to think about their CPR training they attended only to get out of the office for a day.
So I'm starting again. It may not last long and I find myself starting again, but as long as I can start again I'm happy.
The year 2020 can just be one of those 'remember that year when...' years.
Just One Step at a Time
Well, I think I can scratch out the goal of making 2019 the year I would improve my running. Like every well-laid plan, it failed the early stages.
Some may take the previous statement to mean I’m dejected about the whole thing. I suppose earlier on in the year after cancelling several ‘bucket list’ events I’d signed up for that would have been a good observation. I’d lost my running ‘mojo’ and the experience of getting it back was as successful as starting a Morris Minor (an old car for all you young’ens) on a cold winter's day... A lot of noise and smoke, but no success.
I was so frustrated. There was nothing physically wrong with me, I just couldn’t be arsed. No amount of ‘internal’ pep talking would get me out of the rut.
So I canceled events. The ever wishful part of me thinking I could get out of the rut, left the cancellations too late, and I lost money. Look at it this way. I got a load of DNF (Did not Finish) without even putting my trainers on.
What a cyclone I found myself in. One part of me, knowing the benefits running had for my mental health was battling another part of me trying every way possible to put obstacles in my way. Obstacles such as, I’m too busy at work, it’s too cold outside and the all-time favourite, I’m too tired.
I’m not sure what witchcraft has been at work, but I woke up and said enough is enough and this has got to change.
So here I am, I’ve got a plan. A plan so simple is can’t fail. Just go for a run. It doesn’t matter how far it is. Maybe it will just be around the block or a 5-mile run, it’s all about consistency. This consistency will help re-enforce the good feeling running brings to me during, at the end and hours later.
The process will bring with it the addiction which helps maintain the habit.
It will not be easy, but not over complicating it will help.
When I don’t feel like running, I’ll promise myself that if I’m still not happy after 10 minutes running I’ll turn around and go home. To date, I’ve never turned around yet.
So, I’m on a journey and at present the destination seems so far away, but I’m just going to take it one step at a time.
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